Feeling Sad? Unsure Of Yourself, Your Life, Your Goals? Get A Boob Job!

by SJP

I totally canceled my therapy session this morning since there were no free doughnuts or coffee in the lobby.  I had zero interest in going if there were no freebies so I literally walked right back out the door.  What? It’s not rude I was taking time from  work anyway and decided if they wouldn’t feed me I should just leave. 

I hate going anyway; my doctor thinks she knows everything just because she has a PhD.  I mean, I went to college too so I guess I can sit in a leather wingback chair, charge somebody up the ass to say in a low slow voice, “And how did that make you feel?”  Most of the time, that makes me feel very annoyed and if I wanted to talk to a woman to be annoyed I could just call my mother when she’s in the midst of her many Pre-Menopausal fits.

I could just stay home, skip the frustration and diagnose myself with Nip Tuck Reruns! I don’t really need my psychologist; I can just as easily assess my own issues and find resolutions to the problem with plastic surgery

I don’t want to say I’m quitting therapy just yet because I love 20mg Paxil but I think it’s getting to the point where I can miss a few appointments and it’s not going to hurt my cause.  But relax.  I rescheduled my meeting in 2 weeks when my prescription runs out so I’m not giving up on my mental health just yet…