If I Wear Tacky Amounts Of Sequins And Pretend To Give A Shit Everyday Anyway, I Might As Well Get Applauded For It…

by SJP

So I figured out what my profession will be when I get to New York City!  That’s almost half the battle in making a move to any city, let alone New York.  Screw writing!  I don’t need to work at a magazine publication firm, or try to get my own column, no way!   After seeing Chicago off Broadway a couple of weeks ago in NYC,  and watching those girls and boys frolicking around half naked, I have big plans to be a Broadway Star. 

Can you imagine how fast that would go to my head?  I could be the cover of the Playbill pamphlets! I could be on a billboard in Times Square!  I wonder what I’d be doing; how I’d be posing?  Like, I’d want to make sure everything gets in the picture including my ego which can sometimes be hard when you’re working advertising space.

If you think about it, the job is actually perfect for me because I don’t have to think!  I have the “talent”, the “presence”, if you will. I’m a natural when it comes to twirling and smiling while boys carry me across a stage, and I just love flashing spotlights honing in on my beautiful face.

And you know what; it doesn’t really matter that I’m not well educated in the performing arts because I am pretty knowledgeable in the basic idea of Broadway shows which is sparkly costumes.  I know what it takes to be seen and heard throughout a room and I’ve got it right here in my blouse; all I need is a little bit of dazzling pasties and viola, I have mesmerized a crowd with my cleavage

Plus, I fully understand the concept of putting on an act since I do one every night on a date.  I’m very familiar with faking all kinds of emotions just ask any of my boyfriends; pretending is my second nature!

Don’t be surprised if I give up writing and blogging all together.  Next to acting like I give a shit and getting a standing ovation for it, my creative writing endeavors are for the birds…